Archive for the ‘Thoughts’ Category

This smart phone does everything.

After having my Motorola Droid for two weeks, I lost it. And the way it happened made the experience even more gut wrenching.   

On Valentine’s Day, my wife and I went out. Before finding a restaurant, we stopped by the Verizon store for accessories. I was using a cheap belt clip that  fell off sometimes because of its weak grip. I was offered a better clip for $30. $30!!! I declined and walked.  

While at dinner, I turn the ringer off so as to not be disturbed. We had a nice evening. Ate, drank, talked, paid and left. When we got home, I noticed our neighbor having a hard time free her car from the snow.  I decided to be a good Semaritan. After about a half hour of digging and pushing,  I reach for my phone to make sure it’s still there and JIMINY CRICKET- it was gone. I searched EVERYWHERE - our car, under my neighbor’s car and no luck. I even drove back to the restaurant. And since I turned the ringer off, I wouldn’t be able to hear the phone ring if it was near anyways. I prayed for help.  The next day I called Verizon to temporarilydeactivate the phone and and request a replacement. Usually, replacements come the next day, but not this time. Several go by, which made me hate my situation even more. I spend a lot of time talking to friends and co-workers about my disappointment.

Fast forward.

My wife calls  me at work to tell me the phone arrived.  About a week after reporting it lost. (They blamed the snow.) So after work, I went to the Verizon store to purchase the $30 belt clip. Wouldn’t you know it, the same sales person who tried to sell me the clip the first time had a smirk on her face as she operated the register. 

I didn’t want to tell her I lost my phone, but I wanted to know if someone turned it in at the Verizon wireless store.  

“Not a Motorola Droid! You can kiss that phone good bye!  Nobody is going to turn that phone in.” 

       :/           

When I got home, I unboxed and charged my new baby and watched On Demand with my wife. Around 9 p.m., I receive an unrecognized phone call.  Normally, I don’t answer the phone when there is an unrecognized number but this time I picked up.

“Hello,” 

 ”Hello, my name is Fred. I found your Motorola phone and it took me a week to find the right kind of plug to charge it so I could call the owner.” 

I almost dropped the phone in surprise and excitement. I gave God a high five and a thank you and made arrangement to pick it up from him that night. He was at the restaurant, where my wife and I ate the previous week. He said he found it in the snow in the parking lot as he was leaving.  So when I get there to meet him, he handed me my phone. I reached into my pocket and tried to give him a few dollars for his trouble or at least a finders fee. HE REFUSED!  He said, the phone was mine and he is just doing what he would want done for him.  

I left feeling all warm inside.  Before pulling out of the parking lot, I made sure i didn’t drop anything. I sat in the car and prayed.  Before that evening, I was starting to question the real value of doing the right thing, I’m so glad that question received the answer I was looking for. 

If you’re going to ask someone their opinion, then be prepared to receive a response you may not agree with.  That’s kind of a general rule.

Today, I actually received a direct message on Twitter asking me if, and I quote, write “Street Lit.”; you know, the books that have a message wrapped around a storyline that includes drugs, sex, violence (or a combination of the three).  My response was I don’t write those kinds of stories. Immediately, the person called me arrogant and blasted me for my response. Still smh.

First, the person doesn’t even know me. Second, with Twitter’s 140 characters limitation, I really couldn’t go into detail of what I was trying to say.  But here is the detail, I would have shared had I been given the chance.

Street Lit. is not me. I’m a married father of three daughters and I couldn’t pull the stories off authentically. I’m not saying you have to be a hustler to write about one, but my passion for those types of stories is not there. I’m not knocking writers and authors for sharing those types of stories. Those stories are indeed a part of the African-American culture, but I would argue a small part. The vast majority of African Americans do not hustle and sling their way throughout life. But even still, the argument that the street lit. culture only represents a minority of African Americans, pales in comparison to my key argument and writing principle – we have other stories to tell.

Again, no disrespect to my fellow writers who are keeping it real (seriously). And while there’s space on the shelves for stories about king pins losing territory, the hustler who’s out for revenge, or the sexy gold digger teaching bad boys a lesson, I believe there’s also shelf space and interest (despite what some may think) for stories about individuals, copules and families that overcome obstacles honestly and are rewarded for their efforts. I am confident that there is space for stories where love though tried and tested still prevails over easier alternatives. I also recognize that these kinds of stories are NEEDED. I believe there is healing in reading stories where moral heroes prevail.

I’m not saying that sex, violence and drugs have no place in novels. How could I say such a thing with legitimacy? Afterall, my first novel Always Room for Dessert has sex and my second novel opens with death and contains violence.

What I am saying is that what makes the African-American reading experience most valuable is the diversity within our reading genres. I know Street Lit is selling.  You can walk into any bookstore and see an entire shelf section devoted to those types of stories. but as an author, I want to serve as a counter balance and tell stories that add depth to our culture and existence in more wholesome ways. Stories that can elevate as well as entertain.

Perhaps I just need to loosen up.  Perhaps I am arrogant as the Twitter responder claimed and a bit self-righteous. I honestly don’t think that’s it. I actually take pride in the fact that I have an opinion and principles that are right for me and I’m sticking to them — even if it means I don’t get to be on that popular shelf.

I’m on this thing now where I see life’s purpose is to manage distractions. No one gets to simply do what they want.  Life is going to find a way to blow you a kiss — or kick your butt.  And each time you respond either takes you closer or further away from your quest. It really is that simple. 

With this new knowledge, I have been really watching my TV time and even my time on Facebook. I admit it is taking some practice, but boy am I getting some things done. Take today at work for example – I’m focused, knocking out assignments.  I’m on a total roll and then I start getting email forwards, one was pretty funny. 

Then I get phone calls, personal and work-related all taking me off my planned course. In the middle of working, I start handling an impromptu assignment.  This is precisely why when it’s time to leave I have like 18 outlook windows open, six Word documents, two excel spreadsheets and several Web pages open. 

Well, today I kept shutting them down.  Asking my colleagues to set up meetings, asking my family to allow me to call them back and really getting things done. I think I’ve finally gotten control over my distractions.  Finally!!! It’s on now!  I’ll finish my media inquiries about  my book tonight, but first let me respond to these Mafia Wars grenade cocktails I just received.

Yesterday, I spent the better part of the day digging and shoveling.  I pushed cars, I played with the children and toted a few chairs and cones to empty side street parking spaces as if they were extensions of my personal driveway. Despite it being Sunday, my usual rest day – I WORKED!!!  I remember a while ago I read an article that said, if you’re working up a sweat in the snow, stop immediately and go inside. It talked about the body trying to cool itself off – despite the weather being at a close to freezing point.

I knew better.  But I kept saying, I want to get all the work done before the Superbowl so that I can rest and relax then. 

Well, today I woke up with a sore throat.  I was working from home (because I never got the cars actually out), but as time progressed today, I felt my sore throat become a headache, chills, and the weakest spell I’ve had in a long time. And I can’t believe, I actually considered taking the polar bear plunge this year with some co-workers.  I probably would have had a seizure.

So now what? We have a new storm heading our way tomorrow, I’m weaker than a rag doll in the wind and my heavy work went for nothing, my car still is in the same place and will probably be buried again.

I’m not angry.  I’m not even dissapointed.  I gained a lesson in this. When things are really out of your control, all your effort to push, and shovel and grind and grunt and struggle is pointless. Instead try to enjoy it, medidate, pray and rest in knowing while its okay to work towards a goal, you should not risk your health (both physical and mental) for some trivial pursuit.

You won’t be able to enjoy it anyway.  And isn’t that the point?

ACM

Well, I can say I lived to see what a 24 hour period fo snow fall does.  I went outside yesterday to shovel and I just like many other Baltimoreans found thigh-high / in some cases waist deep snow all around.  Beautiful, but at the same time ugly.

Starting Friday around 11 a.m. snow comes to Maryland.  It doesn’t really stick until around

Don't be surprised to get this picture on your christmas cards this year.

5 p.m – 5:30 p.m., but when it started to stick – it became several inches an hour quickly.  I had to shove every two hours, just to make sure my front door didn’t get barricaded.

No plow.

Now normally, I would be outside all day getting my dig on and trying to get a path started, so i can be the first to free myself from this snow cage, but something about what he said made me go back in the house and play with my kids on the Wii.  We wrestled, watched a movie and made the best of the day. I still have to work Monday.  I still have things to do, but I didn’t have to worry about that then.  Perhaps I’ll use that lesson somewhere in the next book.

You ever have a day that’s just kind of, well … there. Just a day that was pretty ordinary. I don’t know what I was expecting, but I guess I was hoping for a little bit of frosting. Some spark in the day, some inspired moment. It didn’t happen. I mean, from the time I woke up to at this very moment, while writing this blog it was just ho-hum… yawn.

I serached for some inspiring podcast, I looked on line for an interesting story, I prayed, even listened to my favorite playlist on Pandora … i just couldn’t get the kindling to ignite.

Now I admit, this doesn’t happen EVERYDAY, and no I am not looking for any drama – Just inspiration is all. As a writer, its important that I’m able to look at things and find a story in it. The ability to find a story and tell it is very important to me. Today I wouldn’t have been able to do it if my life depended on it.

Well, tomorrow.  Tomorrow must be more interesting. It must. Maybe I’ll throw on my red shoes or bow tie and go to work.  That should be a great story starter.  Maybe not a good story – but it will be better than a blank page.

ACM

Quick question – if you could have one thing, right now, whatever you wanted – what would it be? Wealth, happiness, health, love?  Now what if I told you, you could have it but in exchange for something you already have – specifically something you have plenty of and its not good for you anyway. Would you freely exchange it?  When you think about it, it seems obivous that we would jump at the chance, but the truth is we have that offer every day and don’t take it.

You want love, give up your pride – you have too much of it and its keeping real love from finding you.

You want health, give up your lifestyle - you don’t exercise, you eat whatever is most  convenient.

You want wealth, stop spending so much – read, study, build an expertise in something, which you can sell. You have way too much free time on your hand – most of it you waste.

I say you, but really its me. It’s A.C. Moore.  There, I admitted it. Now, excuse me while I bring this blog to a close. I need to figure wout what I can give up. 

ACM

You know what the easiest thing in the world is to do?  Not try.  Think about it. How many goals and dreams go without pursuit on this planet. Dreams of owning a business, losing weight, getting that degree.  Why is that? Seriously! Why do we simply store dreams?  Why can’t you open that shop?  Why can’t you buy that house?  Why can’t I get this book published faster?  LOL.

I’m going to guess – it’s because there is a fear of failing. I mean, if I had to guess, there are probably more failed products than their are successful ones.  But the way I see it, each product / idea that is successful is the result of probably a few failed attempts.  If not by you, by someone else.

I really think failure is part of the process.  Sure, no one likes it, but it’s a critical part of the formula.  The only thing wrong with failing is when we don’t learn anything from it.  If you think about it that’s what experimentation is all about, learning from failures.

Well, I’m going to risk failure today.  I’m going to risk falling on my face.  Risk embarrassment.  Risk some debt.  I’m going to risk my comfort.  Why?  Why would I push this silly dream forward of being an author?  Why would I dare to believe there are those who want to read what I have to say?  Why am I willing to grind this out?  Why you ask?  Because.  I might just mess up and succeed.

I remember talking to a friend of mine (more like a life coach at the time) who told me to work on accomplishing a personal goal that I shared with him. In order to achieve that goal, however there were sub-goals or short term goals I had to meet first. When he asked me to complete one of those goals in a matter of days, I responded with “I will try.”

He quickly corrected me with “There is no try. There is only do or not do.” I’m sure he didn’t make that phrase up, because I’ve heard it before. I think Yoda gave me my first sound bite.

When I first heard that statement, I thought how truthful. My mind has since changed.

There is such an honorable thing as try. It’s the period of striving to achieve a goal, against uncontrolled obstacles. It’s in fact, the journey to a destination – the education achieved by taking often times fearful steps. Much honor is to be held in trying.

Well, here I am. Trying to complete my second novel and get it into your hands. Trust me when I say its a journey. The writing and re-writing, the design, the marketing, the networking, it all takes time and strategy. Though a fan of Nike, I can’t simply Just Do It (as much as I would like).

I estimate about 60 days before the book is ready for distribution. Please pray for me. It’s a trying time.

Question for U – What are you trying to accomplish?